HYLI Vol. LXIX - Protest The Hero and The Stone Roses
The gang sends each other some of their favorite records ever - for Andy, it's prog-metal from the mid-'00s and for Patrick, it's one of the OGs of the Madchester scene
What’s up. It’s Patrick here, of course (Andy: I do every other intro grow up). I have, as of the time I’m writing this, a little under two weeks left of Paid Parental Leave. It’s crazy how four months (a little under, 16 weeks to be technical) have simultaneously flown by and felt like forever. I’m a little bummed to be leaving My Daughter at home, while I go to work for The Man, but alas. Being an adult sucks shit, huh? I’m gonna have to get up at 6 am so I can run or workout before work, come home and feed my baby at 7 am, go to work until the evening, eat dinner, bathe my baby and feed her again during the two hours she’s awake after I get home, and then go to bed like an hour after that? What the fuck (Andy: yeah it sucks). Where is the time to be a person or hang with my offspring? (Andy: there isn’t any) This sucks. I’m sure in a month or two, I’ll adjust (Andy: you won’t), but I just want to stay at home and keep hanging with her? I finished watching The Bear over the weekend. What a program. Not only is it a great program but it reminds me of how Great Chicago is and makes me wish I spent more time actually in the city and less in the oppressive suburbs. Sorry for a downer of an intro. Music is great. I love it. Hope you like it or whatever, who gives a shit.
Protest The Hero - Kezia
Andy: I love this album so much. It is one of those albums that is exhausting for me to listen to because I feel it so much. One of the first albums that really changed me as a person. I learned that the verse-chorus-verse structure didn’t have to exist and bands could do more than the radio leads you to believe. This is Protest The Hero’s first album that they wrote when they were like 16. How in the absolute shit did they write this at like 16? Seriously? Insanity.
“Blindfolds Aside” is one of the greatest songs ever written. The riff, the solo, “Five soldiers forever sedated…”, the claps before the final break down, the acoustic outro. Literally perfect. I know lyrics don’t matter, man, but Arif goes so hard on the lyrics in this song and the entire album. Give me a concept record like this every time and I’ll tell you lyrics matter. This album has so many great ‘moments’ in it. The end of “Turn Soonest to the Sea” … I mean come on man. I don’t think there are more fun group vocals to sing at a show.
Rody is an incredible modern metal vocalist. I didn’t think bass was an interesting instrument at all until this album (Patrick: jesus christ man) (Andy: I was 15? Were you out here loving the bass instrument at like 13 you actual dweeb) (Patrick, again: I literally started playing bass when I was 14 lol). You can hear Arif having a blast on every song. Not to mention writing all these lyrics? If I ever looked at a lyric I wrote at 16 I’d probably die of embarrassment. Jadea Kelly’s appearances on Protest albums have always been *chef kiss emoji* moments but nothing tops her moments as the titular Kezia on this album. I didn’t really know guitars could do this until I heard Luke and Tim just go nuts on this record.
Protest falls into a Tarantino-esq rating system for me. Their worst album is far and away better than most bands’ best. While I still think Fortress is their Magnum opus, Kezia is an incredibly close second. Hope You Like It (Patrick: I think this is the least amount of times I’ve interrupted you, good job bud love u).
Patrick: This one feels like a bit of cheating. Looking at the band’s Wikipedia, it seems Protest the Hero has five records, two of which I have already heard in full, and I’m almost certain Andy has made me listen to “Blindfolds Aside” before, though not this record in its entirety. I’ve known Andy for 12 years now. As long as I’ve known this fucking kid, he’s been just staying beating my ass down talking about fucking Protest the Hero. In 2011, they released Scurrilous, but you can bet your ass I wasn’t listening to SHIT this kid told me to check out when I was 22 years old. Be for real (Andy: sad you had to live this way).
However, that is because I was 22 and dumb as all shit (Andy: still are 🤙). I should have been listening to this band the whole time! They’re good as hell! I’ve heard other records by this band and the formula seems largely the same, though some stuff gets tweaked. This band, to me, basically is like if you took the first two My Chemical Romance albums and made them slightly (only really slightly) heavier and more technical. In my opinion, that’s a pretty easy recipe for success! As Andy said, “Blindfolds Aside” fucking rips. Man, they even sell the acoustic outro, that is so close to bordering on Youtuber acoustic cover-core, but doesn’t fully tip over into corny. “Divinity Within” has a massive hook, with this Rody character sounding extra Gerard Way-y in the chorus, and then like a classical piano outro? It’s great? “Turn Soonest to the Sea” reminds me of Boys Night Out’s Trainwreck, which I intend as a compliment. There are some heavier vocals scattered throughout that are cool and very mid-’00s too, which adds some appreciated variety. Rody is a great singer but it’s nice to shake it up.
I don’t love every track here. It’s like a solid, respectable, very good 7.5-8/10 for me. I don’t expect Andy to agree since it’s near-GOAT status for him (Andy: Yes it is a 10/10 but you do you) but I like it a whole lot, probably top 5-8 HYLI for me. “Nautical” (Andy: the end of this song is fantastic wyd) and “She Who Mars the Skin of Gods” (Andy: c’mon man) aren’t bad tracks, per se, they just aren’t as good as the rest. It’s fine! I like this album a lot and will return to it a ton. Thank you.
The Stone Roses - The Stone Roses
Patrick: So check it, I like this band Oasis a lot. They’re from this city called Manchester. It’s in England. They play some soccer there, I guess they win a lot. That’s nice for them. Who gives a shit about any of that crap? Oasis rocks, I like them a lot, when I was a little lad getting into that band in my teens (Andy: and loving the bass instrument apparently) (Patrick: MOVE ON), I would Google, as I am wont to do, “WHO ARE SOME BANDS THAT SOUND LIKE OASIS THE BAND WITH LIAM AND NOEL THANKS” and it would always say some shit like Happy Mondays and Inspiral Carpets who sound NOTHING like Oasis and, even worse, fucking BLUR who SUCK SHIT. Anyways, it would also always say The Stone Roses. None of those other things apply to The Stone Roses. They don’t suck shit. They do sound like Oasis. They’re from Manchester, as well, as kind of were a major part of this scene called Madchester, which mixed typical British rock of the time (the mid-’80s) with dance music that was burgeoning in the country at the time. Brother, it’s fucking sick. This isn’t as good as Oasis but it’s about as close as you get, while also rocking moderately harder.
Man. During the Peak Pandemic, when I was bored out of my skull, I made a Google Doc of my Top 100 Guitarists Ever. Looking at it now, I see John Squire at #54. Plainly incorrect. This dude rips and should be much higher. Do you ever listen to Britpop, outside of the first two records by Oasis, and wish the guitars sounded just 10% closer to Jimmy Page and like 25% closer to Johnny Marr, at the same time? (Andy: what) Well, I’m sure you do not, but if you do - listen to the Stone Roses! This MFer is just shredding. The solo in “Bye Bye Bad Man,” the main riff to “Made of Stone” (my favorite on the album) and the entire compositions of “I Am the Resurrection” and “Fools Gold” are just incredible music. Shoutout to “Fools Gold” especially for marrying Squire’s wah-pedal riffing with a crazy drum groove from Reni and just one of the best bass riffs ever from Mani (yes these two men go by one name, Andy) (Andy: neat).
I play guitar so of course I’m being a dork about the guitar stuff but it wouldn’t work without Ian Brown. I’m not going to talk AT ALL about his personal beliefs or recent talking points FORGET ABOUT IT (Andy: oh). I’m going to talk about The Music and how cool his voice fucking sounds on “Fools Gold” and “I Wanna Be Adored.” The perfect foil to Squire. One dude is not all that talented but gets by on being infinitely cool and one dude is one of the most talented at his instrument ever and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a picture of him or heard his voice once. Now I’m wondering who is the John Squire and who is the Ian Brown in Andy and I’s relationship. NEVERMIND. This album fucking rules. This is as good as music gets. It’s so ‘80s and so timeless. Also, as an addendum, Andy is always like “lyrics don’t matter” and I’m always like “album art doesn’t matter.” This art fucking matters, bro. Look at that shit. Perfection.
Andy: This is Oasis right? Like a joke where they pretend they’re another band. Ha Ha! I kid. Very much a “hey this band is good and sound a lot like Oasis but definitely not as good as Oasis” sort of thing going on here, for sure. This album feels super ‘80s to me. Like I picture someone putting this on a record player under some Patrick Nagel artwork and sitting on a white leather couch. Good visual.
As a whole, The Stone Roses is a pretty chill album. They seem to stick with what works for the most part. There's this dream-like echoey thing going on in a bunch of spots which is fun, kinda like far-off reminders of trippy dance-pop stuff. Okay, so pop rock/dance rock can be fun, but does this album have any real bangers? I’m not sure (Patrick: jesus fucking christ dude grow up). “I Wanna Be Adored” maybe. It definitely works as background noise on a sunny day. I’d throw it on a non-metal playlist and be happy. It was getting better and better with each listen.
“Fools Gold” rocks (Patrick: yeah man it is a banger lol grow up). Am I wrong in thinking that, while definitely similar to Oasis, they are a bit more jam/groovy? I feel like they just let things flow a bit longer than the boys in Oasis. The lyrics here were grade A boring imo but no strikes cause we know here that lyrics don’t matter. This feels like one of those albums that kicks off and wraps up on such enormously high notes that it skews your perception of the songs that fill the middle. I don’t quite fully understand why “John Squire at #54 (best guitarists)” is now a bad take for Patrick but I also apparently don’t know anything about guitarists. I think he was fun but can he shred?
My comments come off as me not enjoying it, which I did. I did enjoy it. I didn’t enjoy it to the level that Patrick seems to like it, but it was fun enough for me. I don’t think I’d put it in the top 10 of albums he’s recommended here, but the top half? Sure. I Enjoyed It (Patrick: you are so annoying).